To my tiny little clinger:
Today has been hard.
Today felt unproductive and our house is still messy.
I tried to unload the dishwasher, but you pulled on my legs and cried until I could not take it anymore, and I gave up trying to clean to hold you close.
When I started folding your laundry, you crawled over the top of it and pulled it out of your dresser, so the pile continues to grow in your room and I am not sure when I will have time to try again.
During nap time I tried to catch up on work. I made phone calls, scheduled appointments, ordered groceries, and before I could make myself lunch, you were up again.
You cry when I leave the room and want to be next to me at all times.
We read the same book 30 plus times today.
Yesterday you liked bananas, today you made a sour face after the first bite and threw it all on the floor. (Meatballs for breakfast it is!)
I sat down to reply to my 67 unread messages but you wanted to play with my phone and threw your whole body down when I would not give it to you.
I put Cocomelon on the TV because I just couldn’t take the screaming anymore.
You got to the dogs food before I could and ate a handful. “Doctor Google” said you are fine but that still doesn’t stop the worry from flooding my thoughts.
I want to leave, to get out of the house, but sometimes leaving is more stressful than staying. (Diaper bag + coat + carseat + stroller = super sore back later.)
Today has been HARD.
But, today has also been so rewarding.
Our house remained a mess but you laid in my arms and touched my face while we sang songs.
You discovered how to dig into drawers and explore your environment more.
I checked some “mama things” off of my to-do list.
You were fed… and we can try bananas again next week.
You learned more through reading. I love watching you soak everything in.
I didn’t get to my messages but I found your tickle spot and made you GIGGLE LIKE CRAZY.
You danced with JJ from Cocomelon.
You challenged your taste buds with chicken + rice flavored dog food, and maybe got some protein?
We stayed warm and snuggled and soaked in these precious moments in time that we will never, ever get back.
As a new mom, I am continuously reminding myself to take it one day at a time.
I think it’s easy to get caught up in the “to-dos” of our days and forget to look at each moment as a blessing. It’s easy to focus on what we don’t have done and dwell on the little unplanned events that happen to make our days so “stressful”. What if instead we sat down and found purpose in each unplanned event? What if we embraced the “stress” and learned to trust in what the Lord has in store for us with each twist and turn of our days? Our perspective holds so much weight in our realities, and this goes for parenthood as well! I believe there is always something to celebrate, even in the midst of our crazy.
It's important to also take a step back and remember that every good and perfect gift comes from above, and children are just that: good and perfect gifts from our amazing God. And that same God is the God that promises to sustain and refresh us when we are weak and weary, and He never gives us anything we can't handle, because we can do ALL things through Him who strengthens us.
To all of my mamas feeling tired, frustrated, or flat-out stressed out, remember this truth:
"Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28 NLT
Hold onto Jesus. We can't do it without Him.
And to my little tiny clinger, keep clinging.
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